The 5 biggest mistakes people make in relationships

In today’s show you will….

learn what the five biggest mistakes people make in any relationship are, and how to defeat them!

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And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I’ll send you a special free gift).

If your marriage needs help, please call us at 800-975-8748 to hear how the Smalley Intensive program can help you today.

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NOTES

Five Biggest Mistakes People Make in Relationships

1. Poor Communication (not listening by reloading)

Solution: Listen, understand, validate and empathize

Listen and hear my voice; pay attention and hear what I say. (Is. 28:23)

2. Poor self-care…you end up empty and exhausted

Solution…you’ll have to tune in next episode for the solution!

ARTIST HIGHLIGHT

Matt Brouwer – Where’s Our Revolution – Click here to view on iTunes

BROUGHT TO YOU BY SMALLEY CENTER – IF YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS ON LIFE SUPPORT, GIVE US A CALL AT 800-975-8748.

Tags: communication, conflict resolution, The 5 Biggest Mistakes People Make in RelationshipsMy passion is help you get it, so your relationships don't completely stress you out! That's why "The DNA of Relationships" study is so important, or the book my wife and I barely survived writing (because we are so different...we almost killed each other. You'll have to read the book to understand.), will revolutionize the way you resolve conflict. "The Surprising Way to a Stronger Marriage". Click on the links to learn more about those resources and find more that will help you love each other like you never dreamed possible!

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Women and anger (Everyday Relationships Radio with Dr. Greg Smalley)

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 37:49 — 8.7MB)

On our previous program we discussed men and anger, and on this episode, we explore women and anger…if that’s even a real thing.

Susie assures us women are always poised and perfect.

But, just in case, we’ll help moms, wives and women deal with root causes of their anger and how they can deal with it in a healthy way.

And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I’ll send you a special free gift).

If your marriage needs help, please call us at 800-975-8748 to hear how the Smalley Intensive program can help you today.

FEATURED RESOURCE

Tags: anger, anger management, Dr. Greg Smalley, Everyday Relationships Radio, women and anger

My new role as Vice President at Focus on the Family gives me the opportunity to serve millions of marriages and families around the world. I'm honored to continue my dad's legacy in helping couples and families learn how to honor God and each other in how they communicate and resolve conflict. One of my foundational life messages was developed with my dad, brother, and an entire team while living in Branson, "The DNA of Relationships" DVD series. I want to encourage you to pursue a community of believers through the power of a small group. It's why we produce these curriculums. They really do help you keep all your relationships focused and moving forward.

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You can’t do it alone

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 37:44 — 8.6MB)

It’s the American way to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and forge our own destiny, but who says that’s the best way? And how exactly to you pull yourself up from a bootstrap? The truth is, you can’t do life alone…people need people. Jill Savage will join the conversation as we talk about the importance of having a core group of people in your life to support you, no matter what.

And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I’ll send you a special free gift).

If your marriage needs help, please call us at 800-975-8748 to hear how the Smalley Intensive program can help you today.

FEATURED RESOURCE

Tags: Dr. Greg Smalley, Everyday Relationships Radio, friendshipMy new role as Vice President at Focus on the Family gives me the opportunity to serve millions of marriages and families around the world. I'm honored to continue my dad's legacy in helping couples and families learn how to honor God and each other in how they communicate and resolve conflict. One of my foundational life messages was developed with my dad, brother, and an entire team while living in Branson, "The DNA of Relationships" DVD series. I want to encourage you to pursue a community of believers through the power of a small group. It's why we produce these curriculums. They really do help you keep all your relationships focused and moving forward.

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The Rich You Formula

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 33:06 — 75.7MB)

Gary Smalley and Ryan Chamberlin explain how the Rich You Formula will help you achieve balance in what’s most important. The also discuss from the book the five beliefs that will lead you to success:

RelationshipsResponsibilitiesLeverageLeadershipLegacy

Hear what Gary has to say about 1 Timothy 6:3 – the foundation of his life! What was Gary’s unique dream and prayer about work and money? It’s the most powerful concept ever!

And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I’ll send you a special free gift).

If your marriage needs help, please call us at 800-975-8748 to hear how the ER4LOVE Intensive program can help you today.

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Tags: business, Finances, gary smalley, Rich You Formula, Ryan ChamberlinMy passion is help you get it, so your relationships don't completely stress you out! That's why "The DNA of Relationships" study is so important, or the book my wife and I barely survived writing (because we are so different...we almost killed each other. You'll have to read the book to understand.), will revolutionize the way you resolve conflict. "The Surprising Way to a Stronger Marriage". Click on the links to learn more about those resources and find more that will help you love each other like you never dreamed possible!

View the original article here

2 things you can do to overcome anything

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:00 — 1.6MB)

SCRIPT

My favorite news show by far is CBS’s Sunday Morning News. I love it because 90% of their stories have nothing to do with the government, the latest kidnapping, natural dasters, death, or shark bites.

Recently I heard Dr. Dennis Charney, Dean of Medicine at Mount Sinai in NY, share his research on how people surivive trauma. His research wants to discover why some people thrive after trauma while others are devestated by it.

His answer…2 things… 1. They have a strong support community around them and 2. they are infinitely positive. They’ve got optimism.

Maybe your trauma isn’t war or injury related. But your relationship has caused hurt. Maybe these two things will help you thrive as well.

And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I’ll send you a special free gift).

If your marriage needs help, please call us at 800-975-8748 to hear how the ER4LOVE Intensive program can help you today.

FEATURED RESOURCE

Tags: divorce, traumaMy passion is help you get it, so your relationships don't completely stress you out! That's why "The DNA of Relationships" study is so important, or the book my wife and I barely survived writing (because we are so different...we almost killed each other. You'll have to read the book to understand.), will revolutionize the way you resolve conflict. "The Surprising Way to a Stronger Marriage". Click on the links to learn more about those resources and find more that will help you love each other like you never dreamed possible!

View the original article here

You complete me and other ridiculous ideas about love

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“I love you. You… you complete me.”

That quote from Jerry Maguire and it’s a bunch of hooey! The problem with couples today is they see movies like Jerry Maguire, and actually believe that kind of malarkey is the stuff of true love.

I’m done with the Irish colloquialisms, and I’m done with Hollywood’s idea of love. “You complete me” isn’t love, it’s lust. It’s emotion, and it’s got nothing to do with love. True love is what you say when you don’t feel all gooey inside. True love is what you do when you don’t “feel” like being very loving.

Instead of the “you complete” me’s of the world, how about we all start saying, “I choose you today, no matter what!”

And by the way, if you haven’t left a review yet in iTunes, don’t be shy, it’s easy to do and it really lets me know you’re listening (as a thank you, after your review is submitted, I’ll send you a special free gift).

If your marriage needs help, please call us at 800-975-8748 to hear how we Intensive program can help you today.

FEATURED RESOURCE

Tags: Jerry Maguire, loveMy passion is help you get it, so your relationships don't completely stress you out! That's why "The DNA of Relationships" study is so important, or the book my wife and I barely survived writing (because we are so different...we almost killed each other. You'll have to read the book to understand.), will revolutionize the way you resolve conflict. "The Surprising Way to a Stronger Marriage". Click on the links to learn more about those resources and find more that will help you love each other like you never dreamed possible!

View the original article here

Happy World Poetry Day from Zoosk

Did you know today is World Poetry Day? To celebrate, Zoosk teamed up with poet Indigo Williams to come up with these 5 tips on how to be more romantic with poetry.

1. Put a new twist on the old love letter

2. Create your own e-book of favorite love poems

3. Mixtape of Spoken Word love poems

4. Send a quick voice note or electronic card with a haiku

5. Turn a favorite poetic line into a Gif and send it in an email

Interested in how to use these tips in your own romantic life? Check out the full article with more detailed advice over at Female First! Happy Zoosking!

Photo via Flickr. Creative Commons Attribution License.

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From the Heart: Break Ups

Over the last month, Heart Friend has been answering your dating questions on Zoosk’s Facebook page. He’s had fun offering you his sage advice week after week, getting to know you guys, and helping you on your path to finding love and happiness. But now it’s time for Heart Friend to say goodbye – for now – with a final dating advice segment, fittingly on the topic of break ups. The final installment of From the Heart is about “the end”. How to handle it? Gracefully, hopefully, and he has a few words to say on the matter. We hope that you’ll watch before saying goodbye – for now – and if you’re going through a break up, we hope we can cheer you up at Zoosk. Because we date smarter. XO.

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5 questions about dating and money answered by Steve Mazzucchi

Steve Mazzuchi is the managing editor at Mademan.com. Steve’s written about dating for Men’s Health, Men’s Journal, Maxim, ESPN The Magazine and Esquire.

 We gave Steve 5 questions about love and money and he answered them.Ok, so the date is not going so well and we both know it.  Then the bill comes. Do I still pay? Typically, as a guy, I’d pay but I’m not seeing any return on my investment.Steve says: Yes, for multiple reasons. First, it’s the gentlemanly thing to do. Second, if you saw Zoosk’s latest survey, you know you don’t have to spend a lot on a first date. And third, it never hurts to make a positive impression. Girls talk, and you want this one saying only pleasant things to her friends because you never know, one of them could be your dream girl. Talk about a return on your investment!Online group deal coupons are my latest addictions, but I hate to look like a cheapskate!  Is it cool for me to use these deals on dates or is that setting me up for failure?Steve says: In a word, nope! It’s tempting, yes, but no girl wants to feel like you got a “deal” on your date with her, and research shows the majority will be turned off. Now, if you’ve been together a while and have a higher comfort level together, that’s a different story, but as a general rule, no coupons on the first date. Capeesh?When a date offers to go Dutch, I usually decline, but sometimes she insists and it can get kind of awkward. Should I really put my foot down and pay for 100% [OF?] the date?Steve says: If you ever want to see this girl again, you should pay. It sends the message that you are serious and this is, in fact, an actual date (as opposed to a one-way ticket to the friend zone). If it starts to get awkward, say something like “you can get the drinks at our next stop.” This not only moves things along, it sets up the next phase of the date and lets her know you’re into her. And when she does actually pick up those drinks, you’ll know she is into you too.I have been dating a guy for 2 months and he recently asked me out on a date that far exceeds my own budget.  Do I need to be upfront that I can’t afford it, or should I assume he is going to pay since it was his idea?Steve says: Ah, that’s a tricky one, but two months is enough time for you to feel comfortable being upfront. The key is timing. You want to wait for a moment when you are out together, having a good time and feeling close, to share your feelings about the situation. A standup guy will understand, and from there you can figure out the best course of action. Which is undoubtedly preferable to you getting stuck with a very uncomfortable bill.My boyfriend whom I’ve been dating for six months makes a lot less money than I do. At first this was not a problem, but now it seems like I am paying for everything. We really like each other but am I being taken advantage of?Steve says: You’re not being taken advantage of—intentionally, anyway. But you have to ask yourself a couple questions. 1) “Is he bringing something to the table that makes up for his lack of income?” And 2) “Is this how it’s always going to be, or is it temporary?” Case in point: one of my friend’s then-boyfriend made less than her when they met, but he was 1) a fun, charming guy who happened to be a fantastic cook and 2) in grad school studying computer science. So she could answer “yes” to both questions and, years later, they’re happily married. Of course, if you find yourself answering “no” to both questions, you’ll need to have some sort of talk—or be prepared to spend a lot of nights staying home watching TV.Want some ideas for wallet-friendly summer dates? Check out Steve’s suggestions here!Photo via Flickr. Creative Commons Attribution License.

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